Emotions are the microphone of the mind as I see it, because they deliver the message of the mind that others are unable to hear, for instance people are going to know what is going on inside your head based upon your emotions on the outside, if you are thinking good thoughts and having a positive experience in life you will act happy, if you are thinking sad thoughts, depression is sure to show, sometimes the microphone doesn’t get turned on and your emotions are in short supply, occasionally the microphone is up far too loud and your emotions blare, and unfortunately there are those times that you get all tangled up in the cord not knowing what you are feeling and confusing your audience in the meantime, but when used correctly your microphone can be just the motivation and inspiration that your audience needs.
Looking through all of the sentences I definitely like this one the best because the analogy really is very fitting. You do a great job of providing examples of all of the different emotions that can be felt and equating those emotions to a microphone. I especially liked the emotion of being confused being paralleled to being tangled up in the cord of the microphone. Your sentence wonderfully conveyed your point and the structure was great. There are a few grammatical errors, but it's pretty tough to write a 75+ word sentence without making any grammar errors.
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, I love this sentence because it pinpoints the subject which directly relates to our daily life. I also believe that emotions play a significant role in our daily lives. We often tend to act relying on our emotions. Even though we try to follow our logic, it is often true that we are more likely to follow what we feel at that moment. While we are subconsciously or consciously aware of our emotions, it often happens that we cannot tell exactly what we are feeling and what we are thinking. This is due to the fact that our feelings are sometimes too complicated to be explained. At the same time, emotions are the crucial key to communicate with others. Thus, it is quite important to express emotions properly in order to integrate well with others. Nevertheless, let me just analyze your sentence. The idea expressed in this sentence is applicable to many situations in our daily lives; thus, I assume that this sentence is following deductive reasoning. The sentence itself is logically connected, and it is always consistent on your focus. First of all, you stated the main idea of what you wanted to write. Then, you provided couple of examples in order to show how important the emotions work and give the reader a clue on how to follow your ideas. Also, at the end, you concluded that if we use our emotions in a proper way, it will inspire and motivate audiences. Each idea is put into proper order; this flow of the sentence helps the reader to understand your world better. Thus, I would say that the arrangement of the sentence is well developed. Moreover, I have noticed that you used very simple language to express your thoughts. I saw neither complicated words nor expressions, as everything was expressed in a very simple way. Therefore, it seems like that the sentence easily remains in the reader’s mind and is incredibly memorable. Sometimes, people use very complicated words just to make their works look more sophisticated. Well that is sometimes necessary, especially in a professional environment. However, I still personally prefer simplicity, because it opens the door to my imagination. On the other hand, if a writer uses complex terms, it often shuts down the imaginative process in which the reader immerses themselves. Because of that, I will also say that the delivery of this sentence is very well organized, due to the simple but thought provoking structure. In this way, this sentence appeals to the audience in the most effective way.
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